Monday 25 November 2013

I'm Shattered






Belinda has made up her mind, and it's all over. This has really taken my by surprise. It seems she has been talking to other people about how she has been feeling... but not with *me* - until last night. What is really hard is that we'd been working really hard on our communication as well. She just stopped talking with me lately. It seems I'm just too awkward to live with, with my ongoing physical and mental health issues, and she feels as if she hasn't the emotional resources to keep 'us' together anymore.

I don't know what I'm doing at this stage. She's allowing me to stay here for 4 weeks, + I don't want to see her any more upset (she *is* a good person), so I'm hoping to go before then - just don't know where/when/how etc etc. I know I do not want to stay in this town - it's been sucking the soul/joy out of me.

Needless to say, I'm shattered, deeply upset and still in shock at the moment.

Please don't feel any malice towards Belinda, OK? She is only doing what she feels is best for her. Thank you.

Peas be with ewe 
Mal

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