Tuesday 25 November 2008

Monday Monday

Mariposa asked to hear Three High-5 moments of our lives. These could be funny, momentous, or even embarrassing.

1] The birth of my three sons. My life changed for the better the very first time I held "Mistah Bhoy" in my arms for the first time. I wept tears so deep and expressive, simply because there simply were not the words of eternal gratitude to express what I was feeling.

2] The death of my dad. Actually, I was on auto-pilot for about six-weeks afterwards... twas just my subconscious way of coping with the grief. However, one evening after a meeting I was at, I literally just lost it and had to pull the car to a complete stop.

I howled. I screamed. I slammed my fists into the wheel. "No! No! NO!" I couldn't see for the tears flooding my eyes.

Just thinking about it brings a tear to my eyes...

It passed after about 2 minutes... I guess I just really needed to let all that out (obviously), and I felt 1,000% better afterwards. I wasn't consciously not grieving for my dad before that point, I just had never experienced anything like that before, and i guess i was just coping by keeping busy. I'm not sure.

I don't think I've really ever got-over the passing of my dad. I loved him, and had no negative or hostile things to say to him the last time I saw him. I just miss him as he was always a good friend for me. I just really miss having an old mate to talk to somedays.

3] Is an incident I did in 1985, that I refuse to talk about here. Sorry, but I've gotta set some personal boundaries, even in a place like this. Needless to say it's totally negatively affected the rest of my life as a result.
Peas be with ewe
Cyalayta,
Mal :)

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10 comments:

  1. Oh, sorry to hear about your Dad...glad you've move on...and has so many good memories to look back with him!

    Thanks for joining Fun Monday...hope to see you next week!

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  2. Yes, having your new child is incomparable,


    inconsolable, many of us -- after losing loved one. I hear ya.

    hey -- here's a hug for number 3, too!

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  3. I'm so with you on 1.
    I think it's great you had such a brilliant relationship with your father. Sadly I didn't with my dad, however I was still shocked when he died so young (50).

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  4. Losing a parent is something that children (even grown ones) are just not equipped to handle. I lost my dad when he was 58, and I 21. I still kind of struggle with it.
    You sound like such a great Dad. Enjoy those darling boys, they need you.
    What is Fun Monday and why wasn't I invited??? Hmmm??

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  5. Thankfully I've never lost a parent yet - and dread the day.

    Whatever happened in 1985 - sorry that it had to have such a negative impact. Hopefully there have been many more positive things (like the birth of your sons) to balance it out!

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  6. Yeah man. Listen to my song 'Lifeboats for the Dead' which is all about my 'closure' dream about my old man. I miss him so much. Never a day goes by when I don't think about the old boy. I loved him with all of my heart. He's been gone eleven years and it still feels like yesterday. I cry less often these days though.

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  7. I can totally relate to both feeling, the overwhelming joy and love of holding your child for the first time and the grief when a parent is gone. I miss my parents...so much. My dad was my rock. I miss talking to him. Grief is so difficult.
    XXXXXX

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  8. It took me a while morn my Mom at the time of her death I was to the point I want to give people $5 to just go away - I didn't but it takes time and I think we will always miss them. As for you last Item son't let the negative hold you learn and move beyond.

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  9. I have not lost either of my parents yet, but I feel the same way about them as you do your dad. Not only are they my parents, but they are my friends too. I cannot imagine losing them, but I know that one day I will. I am not looking forward to that one.

    Ah - babies. Best day of my life.

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